In 8 years

In eight years I got to see you grow up from a small boy, to a strong, independent, smart, kind, godly boy. You have forever changed my life, and I will always miss you. You have changed many lives and I will never forget all the times I have held you, played with you, had sibling fights, wrestled you to the ground, and everything else we did together. I know you are in a better place now, but I wish you were still with me. I love you Raymond John Winter Jr.

Where and Who is God?

God is Everything and God is Everywhere.

He is perfect, just, loving, amazing, powerful,
all-knowing, he is the beginning, and the end. He is the creator of Everything.


He is a judge, a father, a King, ruler, governor, a friend
...He is Everything.

I Love You

I wish I got to spend my birthday with you, but I will always love you and remember you.

Life as a teacher

Being a teacher means that you have to be able to do many roles, you just aren't a teacher, but a custodian, librarian, a friend, an enforcer, a play mate, and many other things. In order to be a teacher you have to be patient, because there are going to be times where children will tell you that they have to go to the bathroom, and they will just stand there and pee on themselves, or you have to fight back the urge to yell at them when they try to flush toys down the toilet. Being a teacher is definitely an interesting a roll, and there are many rewards that come out of it. My favorite part of being a Pre-K teacher is seeing how children interact with one another, and how they respond to questions. I was recently asking my students what there favorite bible story was and one of the girls responded with "toy story 3, ABC." It is comments like those that make me want to teach children. I find it interesting how children can be more grown up than adults are at times. It amazes me how fast children can forgive one another, or how much they love everyone and are accepting of one another. I love teaching the children in my Pre-K class because not only am I teaching them every day, but they are also teaching me, and making me a better person. The hardest part of my job right now is listening to the children's prayers. They are so concerned with other individuals and they have a hard concept of death, so many of the children are still praying for God to heal Raymond, my brother. I find it interesting how children will discuss their prayer and my brother after they are done with their prayer. Many of the children will say that he is in heaven so we don't have to pray for him any more, while others will say we can still pray for him even though he is in heaven. If only our world would discuss God, prayers, and bible stories like the children in my classroom do, our world would be on fire for God.

New

So this past week I have spent it in Myrtle beach with my youth group from Crossroads. It was an amazing trip, and I was able to learn more about myself and God. I haven't always been in love with myself and there are many times were I havent thought I was good enough because of what others have said to me. Before this trip I have never really gone up to someone and asked them if I could pray for them, and I have never really talked to anyone other than Duke, Marissa, Dawn, and one or two other people about what is going on in my life. However this past week I was able to walk up to someone else and tell them a little about my life and then I asked them if I could pray for them. I was also able to tell the whole group what was going on in my life and what God had been doing. I have been challenging myself to view every situation as "what would Raymond and God want me to do". By having myself think in that manner I have turned negative situations into positives and have been able to see how fortunate I am. I am amazed at how many lives an 8 year old boy has changed, and then I think about what I have done for God and it doesnt even compare, he never complained, cried, he was a friend to everyone, and he shared Christ every where he went.

All for Him

With my brother no longer physically in my life it is quiet and not as enjoyable, but there is a reason for everything. My brother has suffered many medical issues and he is now in God's arms and he will no longer be in pain, no longer have to go to the hospital, no longer have to suffer, no longer have to deal with sin. My brother was a very special boy who lived for God. We had to keep him out of church for awhile since it was a large church and he could not afford to get sick. One day when we took him he decided to get up on the stage and sit next to the teacher, he later interrupted the teacher to finish the bible story. Raymond loved listening to bible stories and showing God's love to others. There were numerous time where he showed how we should act like Christ. One time he feel at our lake house and hit his chin on the fire place, we drove him all the way back to Duke and he sat still, with no drugs and was stitched up and when the doctors were finished he thanked them. He later had to get stitches in his head and again he got them without drugs and again he stayed still the whole time and thanked the doctors again. He was not even 3 years old when he had to get stitches in his head and chin. He has had to go through 5 open heart surgeries and he is so strong and never gave up that he survived every one, even though doctors told us numerous times that he should not be alive. After going to First Grade for a week he got the H1N1 virus and he was admitted into the hospital and later put on full life support. When he was taken off he was not ready to be taken off and it had to be an emergency surgery, and doctors said that he had slim chances of surviving ; but God pulled him through and he lived several more months, and he was walking and talking eating and working on puzzles soon after. While in Michigan a central line had to be put into him, and normally individuals are sedated for this procedure, but he was not, and because God was living in him he was able to comforted the doctor when he reached up and stroked her arm. That doctor later told my parents that "that child has Jesus living in him"(or something like that). No matter where Raymond has been he has brought many people to Christ because of his story and I am grateful to have had him in my life and to be able to call him my brother. He has taught me that we have to be happy with what we have, and that we should never give up, and that having a relationship with God is the most important thing in the world, because you wont always have materials, friends, parents, siblings, a job, or even your life, and that you need to make most of what you have while you have it. I am grateful that I had such an incredible brother who I was able to learn a lot from and be able to come closer to God because of him. I may not like the plan that God had for him, and I may be upset that I do not have my brother around anymore but I know that he is in better hands and that he will always be watching out for me like he always has. I will always love you and remember you Raymond. <3 6-11-2002-7-9-2010 <3. In honor of Raymond I am planning on opening a dance studio, because one of our favorite things to do together was to have dance parties in my room, so I want to honor him in that way.

What I love about you

My brother was my first true friend, and he was like a son to me. We did everything together. There would be days where he would crawl into my bed around 2 am and put his arm around me. We played sports together, and I allowed him to drive our jet ski faster than my mom allowed him to go. We used to cook dinner together and have movie nights and he would sit on my lap and we would hold hands. There are many things that I am going to miss about him. He was such a kind, strong, brave, amazing child, who loved to please people and make others laugh and have a good time. I cannot express how much he meant to me, and how much he still means to me.

I will miss:
his curly blond hair
his smile
his laugh
holding his hand
holding him in my arms
laying with him
his hugs
his kisses
taking him and picking him up from school
seeing him get out of the car with his book bag on that he got from Dawn that was big on him and watching him try and carry his lunch box at the same time
early morning wake up calls at the lake
driving the boat and jet ski with him
having dinner with him
watching him use chop sticks
watching movies with him
having him carry my purse around
putting hair clips in his hair
taking care of him
going to his soccer games
having him come to my soccer games and football games when I was in marching band
having him in the car
listening to him sing his random songs
having him take over chores
his millions of questions
having him ask what time is it
playing on the swing set with him
playing soccer in the back yard with him
teaching him math problems
working with him on his school work
having him go shopping with me
his discussions on how i need to eat healthy and clean my room
his funny sayings
having him say my name
having him tell me I love you
the random dance parties we had together
watching nc state games with him
playing air hockey and wii
having him beat me in memory and hi ho cheerios
listening to him play my instruments
packing his lunch with him
having you not drive your cars around our yard
celebrating you birthday with you
not having you around for my birthday or to see me get married or have kids
finding random juice boxes everywhere from where you put them down
eating watermelon and mint choc. chip ice cream with you
not having a back seat driver
doing puzzles with you
going on tube rides
and watching you grow up

I love you and will miss many things about you but you will always be remembered and you will always be in my heart
Love you
6-11-2002 - 7-9-2010